Day 35

Two sides

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Hello everyone, or good evening?

Today, I would like to change my plan and write about recent events and what I’ve been facing.

Realising that I am definitely in progress, but on the other hand, I started having more trouble and distress in myself. So I thought it's a good time to write them out and share them with you.

【Not yet at all 】

The other day, I visited the cafe called “LOGIC” in Nagoya, where I will be holding my solo exhibition. I visited there to introduce myself and my works so that they can get to know me. At the same time, I wanted to know about them as well.

They were very kind that they welcomed me without hesitation under the COVID situation. They told me many stories about them, and I could also meet the curator of this solo exhibition. They all were very passionate about what they do and I could feel that from what they speak.

It was a very good opportunity to meet them and get to know them!

However, there was one thing in my mind that came up while listening to them. Which was...

“I did it!” Is not enough. That would be just self-centred behavior.

I realised that I need to make clear about my purpose and meaning of holding this exhibition, and I also need to share them with people who are part of this project. I strongly felt that I need to deliver my intention and purpose to all the future audience.

BUT, I couldn’t tell that to them because I didn’t have confidence in myself, which is disappointing. I just could listen to them and that was all I could do in the meeting.

I was very surprising and disappointing in myself at the same time, so that I was sort of angry at myself in the bullet train on the way back home.

Once I came back home, I started seeing many tasks to solve. The most fatal one is to…

“Change myself. To tell them my opinion with confidence.”

There are more tasks and questions I saw, such as…

・What can I do to make this society kinder?

・Why am I drawing?

・How can I affect this society in a good way?

・I haven’t done anything yet, have I?

・Maybe “Kindness” and “Justice” have some similar sides.

There were many other tasks and questions that don’t have an answer to.. which is very difficult for my small brain to deal with…lol

That’s why I need to meet many people to get to know other people’s opinions and different points of view to find the answer in myself.

The meeting made me realise that importance.

Ok! That’s it for today! Sorry if today’s blog made you feel big down… really.

In the next blog, I would like to write about life in Oxford, UK as I was mentioning in the previous blog!

Thank you for reading my blog until the end!

See you next week and have a great weekend (^D^)/~♪